Quotes about Medicine, page 3

The more confused and impulsive a patient is, the less chance there is for a family member or friend to sit with the patient.

Quote by Edward A. Murphy about medicine

The perfect nurse for the job will apply the day after that post is filled by some semi qualified idiot.

Quote by Edward A. Murphy about medicine

If only one solution can be found for a problem, then it is usually a stupid solution.

Quote by Edward A. Murphy about medicine

When the nurse on the preceding shift has surrounded the patient with absorbent pads, the code brown will hit every sheet and miss every pad.

Quote by Edward A. Murphy about medicine

Rest assured that when you are in a hurry, the nurse's notes have not been written.

Quote by Edward A. Murphy about medicine

When you are starting an IV on an uncooperative patient, or dealing with a huge code brown, there is a phone call for you and it's that crabby physician that you have been paging all morning.

Quote by Edward A. Murphy about medicine

Fire drills always occur on your day from hell.

Quote by Edward A. Murphy about medicine

The first person in line when the clinic opens will not require urgent care. The sickest person will arrive 5 minutes before closing: I thought I'd feel better.

Quote by Edward A. Murphy about medicine

You do the: Just discharged the Patient from Hell dance only to turn around and find the Consultant Neuro-Psychiatrist looking at you like you're their next patient.

Quote by Edward A. Murphy about medicine

Last thing you want to hear a doctor say is whoops.

Quote by Edward A. Murphy about medicine

You may not install a car catcher on the front of the ambulance.

Quote by Edward A. Murphy about medicine

The more equipment you see on a EMT's belt, the newer they are.

Quote by Edward A. Murphy about medicine

Examine all chest clutchers first, bleeders next, then the rest of the whiners.

Quote by Edward A. Murphy about medicine

When dealing with citizens, if it felt good saying it, it was wrong.

Quote by Edward A. Murphy about medicine

All bleeding stops eventually.

Quote by Edward A. Murphy about medicine

You can't cure stupidity.

Quote by Edward A. Murphy about medicine

If it's wet and sticky and not yours leave it alone.

Quote by Edward A. Murphy about medicine

Riding shotgun does not mean you shoot the tires of non-yielding vehicles.

Quote by Edward A. Murphy about medicine

If at all possible, avoid any edible item that fire fighters prepare.

Quote by Edward A. Murphy about medicine

EMS is extended periods of boredom, interrupted by moments of sheer terror.

Quote by Edward A. Murphy about medicine