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Your Testimony in Court is unnecessary until both you and your wife coordinate the same time off work together.

Quote by Edward A. Murphy about police, wife, work, time, contentment

Always be sure to give the guy who complains about paying your salary his nickel back before you write his ticket; It will leave him with a better impression of your services.

Quote by Edward A. Murphy about police, salary, contentment

The further away the call is into the sticks directly relates to the likelihood you will need a restroom after you are back in service.

Quote by Edward A. Murphy about police, need, contentment

If a meter maid tells you that you can park there, then most likely you will get a ticket.

Quote by Edward A. Murphy about police, contentment

Never share a patrol car with anyone braver than you.

Quote by Edward A. Murphy about police, contentment

If your response goes well, you're at the wrong barracks.

Quote by Edward A. Murphy about police, bad, contentment

Your Patrol Supervisor will show up when you're doing something really stupid.

Quote by Edward A. Murphy about police, contentment

The warrant you don't read is the one you'll serve at the wrong quarters.

Quote by Edward A. Murphy about police, bad, contentment

No matter how you write it, the Desk Sergeant will want it changed.

Quote by Edward A. Murphy about police, contentment

If you charge in all alone, you'll be shot by your own officers.

Quote by Edward A. Murphy about police, contentment

The diversion you're ignoring is the actual crime.

Quote by Edward A. Murphy about police, crime, criminals, contentment

Anything you do can get you in trouble - including doing nothing.

Quote by Edward A. Murphy about problems, nothing, contentment

When you've secured a crime scene, don't forget to tell the brass.

Quote by Edward A. Murphy about police, crime, criminals, contentment

It only becomes a riot right after you show up.

Quote by Edward A. Murphy about police, rightness, contentment

If you take out the newest patrol car, you'll have an accident.

Quote by Edward A. Murphy about police, contentment

The thing you really need, will be left back at the MP Station.

Quote by Edward A. Murphy about police, need, things, contentment

Flashlight batteries always die out, just when you really need light.

Quote by Edward A. Murphy about police, light, need, death, contentment

Military working dogs attack anything that moves - including you.

Quote by Edward A. Murphy about army, attack, contentment

The helicopter will always be low on fuel, as soon as you need it.

Quote by Edward A. Murphy about police, need, contentment

You'll find the suspect you want, when you're off-duty and unarmed.

Quote by Edward A. Murphy about police, duty, contentment