Grandma got run over by a reindeer
Walking home from our house Christmas eve.
You can say there's no such thing as Santa,
But as for me and Grandpa we believe.
She'd been drinking too much eggnog,
And we begged her not to go.
But she forgot her medication,
And she staggered out the door into the snow.
When we found her Christmas morning
At the scene of the attack,
She had hoofprints on her forehead
And incriminating Claus-marks on her back.
Grandma got run over by a reindeer...
Now we're all so proud of Grandpa,
He's been taking this so well.
See him in there watching football,
Drinking beer and playing cards with cousin Mel.
It's not Christmas without Grandma,
All the family's dressed in black.
And we just can't help but wonder
Should we open up her gifts or send them back!
Grandma got run over by a reindeer...
Now the goose is on the table,
And the pudding made of fig,
And the blue and silver candles
That would have just matched the hair in Grandma's wig.
I've warned all my friends and neighbors,
Better watch out for yourselves.
They should never give a license
To a man who drives a sleigh and plays with elves.
Grandma got run over by a reindeer...