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The longer the title, the less important the job.

Quote by Edward A. Murphy about work

An acceptable level of employment means that the government economist to whom it is acceptable still has a job.

Quote by Edward A. Murphy about work

Once a job is fouled up, anything done to improve it only makes it worse.

Quote by Edward A. Murphy about work

The value of any job task is inversely proportional to its deadline.

Quote by Edward A. Murphy about work, value

The more complicated the job is the less time and useful information you will be given.

Quote by Edward A. Murphy about work, time, contentment

Your best tenants always get job transfers during the worst rental markets.

Quote by Edward A. Murphy about tenants, real estate

The perfect officer for the job will transfer in the day after that billet is filled by someone else.

Quote by Edward A. Murphy about war, perfection, day

The better you do your job, the more likely you are to be shot, injured, complained on, sued, investigated on your day off.

Quote by Edward A. Murphy about police, day, contentment

The number of years on the job is directly proportional to your waistline.

Quote by Edward A. Murphy about police, numbers

The better job you do, the more work you can expect to be handed.

Quote by Edward A. Murphy about medicine, work, contentment

The perfect nurse for the job will apply the day after that post is filled by some semi qualified idiot.

Quote by Edward A. Murphy about medicine, perfection, day

A good tape job will fix almost anything.

Quote by Edward A. Murphy about medicine, good, good luck

As long as stupidity remains epidemic, you have job security.

Quote by Edward A. Murphy about medicine, stupidity, security, contentment

Green, pink & yellow dress suit not a good choice for work, church, weddings, trial, funerals, job interviews, etc.

Quote by Edward A. Murphy about cowboys, work, good, good luck

The slicked up rifle action job that feels so good dry firing at home will never eject shells during the match and if it does they will go into your eye or over your safety glasses and down your collar.

Quote by Edward A. Murphy about cowboys, safety, action, home, good, good luck

If the job of a mother is going smoothly, she thinks she isn't doing it well.

Quote by Edward A. Murphy about mother

The ideal job for you was filled right before you found out about it.

Quote by Edward A. Murphy about ideal, rightness, contentment

In a job interview you need to be well spoken, clear, pleasantly dressed, confident and polite.

Quote by Edward A. Murphy about need, contentment

The job you want is well paying, interesting, fun, rewarding, conveniently located, or attainable; pick one.

Quote by Edward A. Murphy about contentment

Employers are either all the things you'd hate in a co-worker or start looking for another job.

Quote by Edward A. Murphy about employers, workers, hate, things, contentment